The most common question we've been asked so far is, "Is everyone getting along?" My response is always some variation of "Of course! We would allow for nothing else!" I realize that to some my answer may sound overly optimistic or confident, or even clueless as if I am completely unaware of dogs fighting. I am confident, and I am aware of fighting among dogs, but I do not believe I am overly optimistic. I believe I have have been preparing My Pack for harmony from the moment each member arrived.
There isn't one particular thing I've done since Atticus arrived to ensure harmony. Our family's harmony is a family value! To be My Pack's Leader, I have had to earn each member's trust, and I have worked to do that by being fair, being kind and by protecting him and her.
Foster Dog arrived a year and a half ago. We helped him adjust to the new family dynamic by always being fair. We do not allow one dog to take toys from another. We do not allow one dog to intimidate another to force one to move from a favored bed or location. We do not favor one dog over another by showing more affection, allowing differing behavior, or giving more treats. We also do not give treats and praise based on seniority. We reward good behavior from whomever it comes.
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| Jason makes special shakes twice per week. Each dog receives a sampling. What one dog gets, all dogs get. Atticus received his first, and chose to enjoy it by Fosse. |
We are also kind. When a canine family member arrives, there are bound to be a lot of "No"s. I don't yell, "Noooo!!!!" for every infraction. I not only try to show what behavior I want instead of yelling No, I save the big "Noooo!!!!" for things like counter jumping. When Atticus went up the stairs without permission, I did not yell, "Get your butt back down here! Atticus, COME!" I said, "Attie, come down here, buddy. Come on," and he came down the stairs. I said, "Good boy buddy. Stay down here with me," and then I blocked the stairs so he couldn't make that mistake again. When he showed curiosity with upstairs again by trying to scale the barricade, I calmly said, "No, Attie. Come over here," and I interested him in a toy to chew on.
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| Atticus & Foster Dog chewing on high value items. Next to each other. By choice. On Day 2. I love my family. |
When Foster Dog first came to us, he was underweight and unsure. I would cover him with a thick fleece blankie when he relaxed, and he'd tuck his nose under. So cute! He was sweetly accepting of the kindness, and could feel both physical warmth and emotional trust created by Me. The kindness bonded us.
| When Fosse first came...My Little One... |
Possibly the most important way I've earned My Pack members' trust is by protecting them. While my safety provisions of seat belts are not overtly appreciated, I keep My Pack safe in great part with supervision. Luna and Foster Dog have free reign of the house while I am gone, but since Atticus' arrival, he has not been unsupervised. When I have had to be away from home, Atticus has gone into a crate. This keeps him safe and it keeps Luna and Foster Dog from having to witness his TomFoolery! When I am home, I supervise Atticus and work to teach him how to behave at home. Luna and Foster Dog see this and hopefully feel protected from the shenanigans of a new dog who is learning about not jumping on counters, not busting out of doorways, and not howling at chipmunks.
Something I've done hundreds of times, and continue to do, is probably one of the most powerful. When the dogs and I are out walking and a less than well-behaved dog enters our happiness bubble, I direct my dogs to my side farthest from the less than well-behaved dog. I become a barrier and I am protecting My Pack. They see that, and feel it, and it bonds us. They trust me to block whoever is not safe, and to allow around us only those who are safe.
Atticus is allowed around us, with supervision, and he's learning The Ways. Hopefully he's learning that I am fair, kind, and will protect him. So far he seems pretty comfortable, and Luna and Foster Dog seem pretty accepting.
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| They all fit on one dog bed. This was on Day 3. |



3 comments:
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! So cute! They look so sweet together. Looks like Luna and F.D. accepted their new "brother" quickly.
Leanne, they look so perfect together!! I love how you explain what you do and how you do it. I especially liked the detail about not letting one dog take a favored item or spot from another. I have a question. When this came up in my pack, I had a senior dog and a younger newcomer. The newcomer would crawl in with the older dog in her favorite hidey spot (inside my closet) and they would be fine. But if the newcomer got in there first, the older dog would not enter and she would whine and pace anxiously. Possibly thinking about "seniority" but also the comfy bed the arthritic dog craved, I would shoo out the younger dog and let the older one in. Was that unfair? I never thought about it until I read your post.
Jewels, I know your intention was to meet the immediate needs of your arthritic dog and dog lovers won't call that unfair. There are often a number of ways to meet those needs, and if something like this comes up in your future, you could think about how to meet both dogs' needs.
If one dog is less confident and needs your intervention to get its needs met, you could ask the more confident dog to come out of the closet, encourage the other to enter, and then encourage the more confident dog to re-enter. Since you mentioned they were fine being together, they both benefit from a little problem solving direction from you.
Also, it's important to know what "the draw" is. Was it the closet? Was it the bed? Was it truly the combination? Assessing what each dog needs can help you decide where to place things. For Atticus right now, "The Draw" is simply what Luna or Foster Dog has. It's not that he only likes to chew on antlers, it's that FD is chewing on That Antler, therefore, Atticus sees That Antler as the must have. Because of this dynamic, I supervise the chewing and I encourage Atticus to find the other chew toys and antlers desirable (I play with him, I put one toy inside of another, things like that.). Hopefully, this increases his flexibility as well as the trust from Luna & FD that they can enjoy chewing without being stalked or sniped!
Does any of that make sense?
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